1. Don’t ObsessThe first few days of dealing with deployment will probably be some of the most challenging days. If you need some time off, you are entitled to it. However, obsessing over the well-being of your spouse is not healthy. Refrain from watching the news compulsively and do your best at staying calm if you haven’t heard from your spouse in a while. They may just be too busy to communicate at any given time.
2. CommunicateWhile you shouldn’t panic if you haven’t heard from your spouse, you should still communicate as often as possible. It’s quite possible that you have fallen into a routine before deployment, so you can use the phone calls, letters, and face-to-face web time as an opportunity to strengthen your relationship with each other. Be creative and know that it will take time to adapt to a different method of conversation. Soak up all the chances you get to talk and use them as benchmarks to push you forward. While limited, every bit of communication helps.
3. Surround Yourself with SupportYour spouse is the person you told everything to. Now that he or she is gone, it can be tough to keep all the feelings, dreams, frustrations, and fears bottled up. Finding someone to vent to or just be around as company can really soften the frustration and loneliness. Having a close confidant who you share every small thing with will also make it easier when you have big things to talk through. Support communities are usually available in your city and there are even more on the internet. Don’t be afraid to reach out.
4. Get InvolvedAnother method you can use to keep your mind off of your spouse is getting involved with different clubs or events. Make goals for yourself! Join a soccer team, try volunteering, or maybe there’s a small group you’ve been interested in but have never joined. The possibilities are endless. Focusing on something else outside of your world can be a great way to cope. Whatever it is, you should find something that you can enjoy on a weekly basis that gives you some ‘you time’.
5. Be ProudAs mentioned before, your spouse is quite literally putting their life on the line. All for the protection and freedom of our country. You should be proud of that bravery, as it is not something everyone can or would do. Keeping that perspective can make it easier to deal with.
Posted on October 23 2014 in Blog